If you’re going to self-publish a book — to quote the classic 90s alternative band, Morphine — don’t forget your day-glo orange life preserver!
There are so.many.things I did not know when I launched into the self-publishing universe, and I’m infinitely grateful to Skye Kilaen, who helped me put my book together and get it published. She helped me past so many hurdles! I could have filled one of Mitt Romney’s binders with all of my Donald Rumsfeld-style “unknown unknowns” and the subject of this post, the number of folks who prey on would-be authors, fits snugly into that category. I haven’t yet sold thousands of books, but it feels like I’ve gotten thousands of offers to help me do so!
The offers always praise my book and its importance to the world (isn’t GPT helpful?). They tell me that my book deserves a wide readership and that they either (a) have access to a dedicated group of interested readers or (b) know all the secrets to ensuring my book gets found by people on Goodreads, Amazon, etc. They are masters of search engine optimization (SEO) and they are the coordinators of the world’s most interested and interesting book lovers. Or both.
They even dredge up my old books, in particularly telling me how they can help Apocalyptic AI. Not that I’d mind selling more of those…I stand by that book! But it’s a funny thing. Even the publisher doesn’t care to market it. Here we are in, quite literally, the biggest rush of talk about artificial intelligence that the world has seen, and Oxford isn’t interested in opening new doors for my book (which, in my not so humble opinion, was rather important to advancing all the talk that now happens with regard to robotics, AI, ethics, religion, mind uploading, simulation hypothesis, artificial general intelligence, and all the rest of that jazz). Anyway, OUP doesn’t care…but these devoted reader-group-conveners and book marketers do! All I need is to put a few dollars in their hands, and they’ll revitalize the book for a new generation!
But most of the marketing gurus and book lover network builders want to discuss my recently self-published book, Futureproofing Humanity (also available beyond Amazon pretty much anywhere you’d like). They are confident that this book (in the vaguely formulated understanding they’ve gained by running the back cover through ChatGPT or some other LLM), is important and should be widely read.
Of course, I agree. 😉
On the other hand, it’s by no means obvious to me that these individuals have anything interesting to offer. In fact, I’m pretty confident that they don’t. But, obviously, the email addressed to “Ron” about the book The Bachelor Chronicles must surely have some relevance to selling copies of Futureproofing Humanity! And I especially enjoyed the email that tells me that Futureproofing (at least this one referred to a book I actually wrote) “not only highlights dedication and triumph but also captures the heart and discipline behind a lifelong pursuit, which makes it an inspiring read.” Who knew that by exploring the mythical narratives about tech and offering some preliminary steps toward a new myth I would be composing a narrative of personal victory?
Either way, take a look at Futureproofing and be inspired!
Robert M Geraci 